Chapter 10
Monogynic Grief
People Affected: men during the 42 months of monogynic love
Type of Emotion: conceptual punishment
Conceptual Trigger: “ the woman I love is dead ”
Mental Effect: negative
Key Feature: not triggered if monogynic love is no longer active
Key Feature: the longer love had been activated, the stronger the effect
Involuntary Expression: prolonged frowning
Synonym: sorrow
Type of Emotion: conceptual punishment
Conceptual Trigger: “ the woman I love is dead ”
Mental Effect: negative
Key Feature: not triggered if monogynic love is no longer active
Key Feature: the longer love had been activated, the stronger the effect
Involuntary Expression: prolonged frowning
Synonym: sorrow
Purpose
Monogynic grief encourages men to protect the mother of their children.
Conceptual Trigger
Monogynic grief is not triggered if monogynic love is no longer active. If a man fell in love with a woman more than 42 months ago, he will not feel grief if she dies. Men maximize their reproduction by moving onto a new woman after 42 months. Consequently, they are not punished for the death of a woman they should have left.
Monogynic grief is triggered even if the dead woman was childless. Ideally, men would not be punished for the death of a childless woman. However, men cannot detect pregnancy before monogynic love is activated.
Monogynic grief is triggered by a woman’s death, whether the man could have prevented it or not. This encourages men to treat all death as preventable.
Mental Effect
Monogynic grief varies with the length of time monogynic love had been activated. The longer a man had been in love with a woman when she dies, the stronger the negative effect. Men who had been in love for 42 months feel the strongest grief. Men who fell in love more than 42 months before a woman’s death feel no grief.
Monogynic grief varies with the man’s investment. The more time has been invested, the more grief makes a man willing to protect his investment. A man is more likely to run into a burning building to save a woman he met 35 months ago than a woman he met 5 months ago.
Other Species
Other species feel monogynic love and monogynic grief. Marmoset monkeys, wolves and sand grouse are species where fathers help mothers with the feeding and protection of offspring.
Some species feel paternal love and paternal grief. Emperor penguins, rhea and sea horses are species where mothers leave fathers to feed and protect offspring.
Some species just feel paternal grief. Jacana, Darwin’s frog and catfish are species where mothers leave fathers to protect, but not feed offspring.
Monogynic grief varies with the man’s investment. The more time has been invested, the more grief makes a man willing to protect his investment. A man is more likely to run into a burning building to save a woman he met 35 months ago than a woman he met 5 months ago.
Other Species
Other species feel monogynic love and monogynic grief. Marmoset monkeys, wolves and sand grouse are species where fathers help mothers with the feeding and protection of offspring.
Some species feel paternal love and paternal grief. Emperor penguins, rhea and sea horses are species where mothers leave fathers to feed and protect offspring.
Some species just feel paternal grief. Jacana, Darwin’s frog and catfish are species where mothers leave fathers to protect, but not feed offspring.
Happiness Dissected is a more practical version of The Origin of Emotions.